June 23, 1907
The most beautiful act is the abandonment in the Will of God.
As I was in my usual state, blessed Jesus would not come, and I was thinking to myself about which would be the most beautiful act, and most pleasing to our Lord, which might more easily induce Him to come: sorrow for one’s own sins or resignation? In the meantime, He came for just a little, and told me: “Daughter, the most beautiful act, and most pleasing to Me, is the abandonment in my Will – but so great, that the soul would remember no more that her being exists; rather, everything for her is Divine Will. Even though sorrow for one’s own sins is good and praiseworthy, yet, it does not destroy one’s own being; while abandoning oneself completely in my Will destroys one’s own being, and makes one reacquire the Divine Being. Therefore, by abandoning herself in my Will, the soul gives Me more honor, because she gives Me everything I can demand of the creature, reacquiring, in Me, that which had come out of Me. And the soul comes to reacquire that which alone she should reacquire – that is, she reacquires God, with all the goods that God possesses. However, as long as the soul remains completely in the Will of God, she reacquires God; but as she goes out of my Will, she reacquires her own being, with all the evils of the corrupted nature.”
June 25, 1907
Whether still or walking, the soul must always remain in the Divine Will.
This morning I was thinking to myself that I felt as though stopped, without moving either forward or backward; and I said: ‘Lord, I myself cannot say what I feel. But after all, I will not afflict myself; whether I am behind, or still, or ahead, as long as I am in your Will I am always fine. In whatever point or in whatever way I may be, your Will is always holy, and in whatever way I will be in It, I will always be fine’
In the meantime, blessed Jesus came for a little while, and told me: “My daughter, courage, do not fear if you feel stopped; but be careful to make your stops in my Will, without going out of my Volition at all. I too make my stops in It, but then, in a twinkling of an eye I do more than what I have not done for years and years. See, according to the world, it seems that I have stopped, because since it deserves to be severely chastised and I am not doing it, it seems that I am not in motion; but if I take the rod in my hand, you will see how I will make up for all the stops. The same for you: remaining always in my Will, if you see that my Will wants you stopped, then stop and enjoy my Will; if you see that my Will wants you to walk, then walk – but walk always in my Volition, because by walking in my Will you will walk with Me, and will have the same Will of my walking. Therefore, remain always at the order of my Will, whether still or in motion, and you will always be fine.”
July 1, 1907
In the Divine Will one forgets about sins.
I was reading about a female saint who would think constantly about her sins, asking God for sorrow and forgiveness. In my interior I was saying: ‘Lord, what a difference between myself and this saint: I, who do not think about sins; and she, who always thinks about them. It shows how I got it wrong.’ In one instant I felt Him move in my interior; something like a flash of light formed in my mind, and I heard Him say: “Silly, silly that you are – don’t you want to understand this? When in the world has my Will ever produced sins or imperfections? My Will is always holy, and one who lives in my Will is already sanctified, and enjoys, nourishes herself with, and thinks of all that my Will contains. And even though she has committed sins in the past, finding herself in the beauty, in the sanctity, in the immensity of goods that my Will contains, she forgets the ugliness of her past and remembers only the present, unless she goes out of my Will. Then, as she would return to her own being, it is no wonder that she remembers sins and miseries. Keep well in mind that these thoughts of sins and of oneself cannot enter my Will; and if the soul feels them, it means that she is not stable and fixed within Me, but she makes some exits.”
Then, finding myself in my usual state, I saw Him for just a little, and He told me: “My daughter, as much as the Truth is persecuted, one cannot help recognizing it as Truth, and the time comes in which that very persecuted Truth is recognized and loved. In these sad times everything is falsehood and duplicity, and so that Truth may have lordship, man deserves to be beaten and destroyed. Part of these blows they themselves will give to themselves, and will destroy one another; others will come from Me – especially for France; there will be such a great mortality as to almost depopulate her.”
July 4, 1907
The soul must ruminate within her mind on the truths she has learned.
I was thinking: ‘How bad I have become – yet, the Lord does not correct me; He does not scold me.’ While I was thinking of this, I felt Him move in my interior, telling me: “My daughter, keep walking, keep walking… If I am goodness, mercy, sweetness, I am also justice, strength, power. If I saw you go backward or commit voluntary defects after the so many graces I have given you, you would deserve to be struck by lightning, and indeed I would strike you. If I do not do it, you yourself can understand why; and if I do not always speak to you - ruminate constantly in your mind on all the truths I have taught you, then enter into your interior, unite yourself with Me, and I will always be with you, operating interiorly.”
July 10, 1907
One begins to really live, when he begins to be a victim.
As I was in my usual state, I found myself outside of myself together with my adorable Jesus, and in seeing Him crowned with thorns, I removed the crown from His head, and with both hands I placed it on mine, pressing it thoroughly. Oh, how I felt the prickings penetrate into me! – but I felt happy to suffer to relieve the pains of Jesus. Then I said: ‘My good Jesus, tell me, is there much time left before You take me to Heaven?’
And He: “Indeed, very little” And I: ‘Your little can be ten…or twenty years. I am already forty-two.’ And He: “That is not true; your years only begin from the moment you began to be a victim. My goodness called you, and you can say that from that time you began to really live. And just as I called you to live my life upon earth, in a little while I will call you to live my life in Heaven.”
In the meantime, two pillars came out of the hands of blessed Jesus, which then became one, and which He kept leaning on my shoulders quite heavily, in such a way that I could not move from beneath them. While He was calling me, there was no one who would go to place his shoulders under those pillars; so they remained suspended in His hands, and while they were suspended, slaughters of every kind occurred. I understood that those pillars were the Church and the world, which had come out of His Most Holy hands, and were held inside His holy wounds. They will always be there, but if good Jesus has no place on which to lean them, He will soon tire of keeping them suspended in His hands - and woe!… but such woes as to be horrifying. They are such and so many, that I believe it is better to keep them in silence.
July 14, 1907
Everything in the soul must be love.
Continuing in my usual state, blessed Jesus came for a little while, and without thinking, I asked: ‘Lord, yesterday I went to confession; if I had died, since confession remits sins, would You not have brought me straight to Heaven?’
And He: “My daughter, it is true that confession remits sins, but the surest and most certain thing to be exempt from Purgatory is love. Love must be the predominant passion in the soul. Love - her thought, her word, her movements… everything, everything must be enveloped by this love. In this way, finding her all love, the Uncreated Love absorbs the created love within Itself. In fact, Purgatory does nothing but fill the voids of love that are present in the soul; and once It has filled these voids, It sends her to Heaven. But if these voids are not there, it is not something that belongs to Purgatory.”
July 17, 1907
The true sign to know whether one lives in the Divine Will.
Continuing in my usual state, blessed Jesus came for just a little and told me: “My daughter, the true sign to know whether the soul lives in my Will, is that everything that happens to her, every circumstance, takes place in peace, because my Will is so perfect and holy that It cannot produce even the shadow of disturbance. So, if in contrasts, mortifications or bitternesses she feels disturbed, she cannot say that she is inside my Will. If she feels resigned and also disturbed, she can say, at most, that she is in the shadow of my Will; in fact, while being outside of It, she is free to feel her own self – but not inside.”
July 19, 1907
Neither aridities, nor temptations, nor defects enter the Divine Will.
Having spoken to someone about the Will of God, it had slipped from my mouth that if one is in the Will of God and feels aridity, one would still be at peace. Now, as I was in my usual state, blessed Jesus corrected me, telling me: “My daughter, be very careful when you speak about my Will, because my Will is so happy that It forms Our very beatitude, while the human will is so unhappy, that if it could enter Ours, it would destroy Our happiness and would wage war against Us. Therefore, neither aridities, nor temptations, nor defects, nor restlessness, nor coldness enter my Will, because my Will is light and contains all possible tastes. The human will is nothing but a little drop of darkness, all full of disgusts. So, if the soul is already inside my Will, before she enters - at the contact with my Will, Its light dissolved the little drop of darkness in order to be able to have it within Itself; Its heat dissolved coldness and aridities; Its divine tastes removed the disgusts, and my happiness freed her from all unhappinesses.”
August 6, 1907
She sees nothing but chastisements.
Continuing in my usual state, I found myself outside of myself, inside a Church, and I seemed to see a most beautiful Lady, with her breasts so full of milk that it seemed that her skin was about to split. Calling me, She said to me: “My daughter, this is the state of the Church. She is so full of interior bitternesses, and in addition to the interior bitternesses, She is about to receive external bitternesses. You, suffer a little, that they may be mitigated.”
And while saying this, She seemed to open her breasts, and forming a cup with her hand She filled it with milk and gave it to me to drink. It was so very bitter, and produced so many sufferings that I myself cannot explain. In the meantime, I saw people starting a revolution, entering churches, stripping altars and burning them, making attempts on the lives of priests, breaking statues… and a thousand other insults and evils. While they were doing this, the Lord was sending more scourges from Heaven, and many were killed; there seemed to be a general uproar against the Church, against the government, and against one another. I was frightened; I found myself within myself, and I kept seeing the Queen Mother, together with other saints, praying to Jesus Christ that He would let me suffer. It seemed He would not pay attention to them, and they kept insisting. Importuned, blessed Jesus answered: “Do not importune Me, be quiet, otherwise I will take her with Me.” But in spite of this, it seemed that I suffered a little bit.
Now I am going to say, all together, that during almost all of these days, as I find myself in my usual state, I see nothing but revolutions and chastisements. Blessed Jesus is almost always taciturn, and every now and then He just tells me: “My daughter, do not force Me, otherwise I will make you go out of this state.” And I say: ‘My life and my all, if You want to be left free to do what You want, take me with You; then You will be able to do whatever You want.’ It seems that in these days it takes great patience in dealing with blessed Jesus.
August 22, 1907
The soul must be in the world as if there were no one else but God and herself. The cause that most renews the Passion of Jesus is the lack of resolution.
As I was in my usual state, my adorable Jesus came for just a little and told me: “My daughter, in order for Grace to have free access into the soul, she must be in the world as if there were no one else but God and herself, because any other thought or thing put themselves between the soul and Grace, preventing Grace from entering into the soul, and the soul from receiving Grace.
Another day He told me: “My daughter, the cause that most renews my Passion is the lack of resolution. Ah! Not even among themselves are they so cowardly as to not keep what they promise to one another. Only with Me do they reach such cowardice and ingratitude, even though they know that I suffer greatly because of it - that one hour they promise, and another they deny what they promised.”
The more the soul is the same in everything, the closer she comes to divine perfection.
I am going through most bitter days, with continuous privations. At the most, He comes like shadow and lightning, and with almost continuous threats of chastisements. Oh God, what an uproar! It seems that the world is shaken; all are in the attitude of making revolutions and of killing one another. The Lord seems to withdraw His Grace, and men become like many fierce animals. But after all, it is better to keep silent about these things, because talking about it embitters my poor soul too much, which is already full enough of bitternesses.
Then, this morning, blessed Jesus came for just a little and told me: “All the works of God are perfect, and their perfection is recognized by their being round, or square at most; so much so, that not a stone is placed in the Celestial Jerusalem, which is not round or square.” I could not understand anything of this; however, as I went about looking at the vault of the heavens, I could see the stars, the sun, the moon, and also the shape of the earth itself – all round. But I could not understand the meaning of it, and the Lord added: “Roundness is the same in all of its parts; so, in order to be perfect, the soul must be the same in all states, in all circumstances, whether prosperous or adverse, whether sweet or bitter. Equality must surround her in everything, in such a way as to shape her like a round object; otherwise, if she is not equal to herself in all things, she will not be able to enter, beautiful and smooth, into the Celestial Jerusalem, and will not be able to adorn like a star the fatherland of the Blessed. So, the more the soul is the same in everything, the closer she comes to divine perfection.”
October 3, 1907
How one’s own self renders God a slave.
As I was in my usual state, blessed Jesus would not come, and I was tormented by the pain of His privation; and not only by this, but by the thought that my state of victim might no longer be Will of God. I seem to have become nauseating before God, worthy only of being abhorred. Then, while I was thinking of this, He came for just a little and told me: “My daughter, one who chooses his own self, even for one instant, represses Grace, becomes the master of himself, and renders God a slave.” Then He added: “The Will of God makes one take the divine possession, but obedience is the key to open the door and enter this possession.” Having said this, He disappeared.
October 4, 1907
The exaltation of the cross. The cross grafts the Divinity to humanity.
Continuing in my usual state of privation, and therefore with little suffering, I was saying to myself: ‘Not only of Jesus am I deprived, but also the good of suffering is taken away from me. Oh, God! You want to put me to fire and the sword, and touch the things which are most dear to me, and which form my very life: Jesus and the cross. If I am abominable to Jesus because of my ingratitude, He is right in not coming; but you, O cross – what have I done to you, that you left me so barbarously? Ah, did I perhaps not welcome you when you came? Did I not treat you as my faithful companion? Ah, I remember that I loved you so much that I could not be without you, and sometimes I even preferred you to Jesus. I didn’t know what you had done to me, that I could not be without you. Yet, you left me! It is true that you have done much good to me; you were the way, the door, the room, the secret, the light in which I could find Jesus. This is why I loved you so much. And now, everything is over for me.’
While I was thinking of this, blessed Jesus came for just a little and told me: “Daughter, the cross is part of one’s life, and only one who does not love his own life, does not love the cross, because it was with the Cross alone that I grafted the Divinity to lost humanity. Only the cross continues Redemption in the world, grafting anyone who receives it into the Divinity; and if one does not love it, it means he knows nothing of virtues, of perfection, of love of God, and of true life. It happens as to a rich man who has lost his riches, and is presented with the means to reacquire them again - and maybe even more. How much does he not love this means? Does he perhaps not put his own life into this means in order to find life again in his riches? Such is the cross. Man had become so very poor, and the cross is the means not only to save him from misery, but to enrich him with all goods. Therefore, the cross is the richness of the soul.” And He disappeared, while I remained more embittered, thinking of what I had lost.
October 12, 1907
She sees places devastated because of Justice.
After going through days of privation and of tears, finally this morning Jesus came and told me: “Ah! my daughter, you know nothing of what is supposed to happen between now and one year from now. Oh, how many things will happen! Take a look.”
At that moment, I found myself outside of myself, together with Jesus, and I saw, somewhere places collapsed and entire towns buried, somewhere places flooded and everything that existed in them disappeared; in other places, earthquakes with great damage, dead people, revolutions in several places - and in some of them, so violent, that one could not take a step without treading on human blood. But who can say all the tragedy that could be seen? After this, good Jesus added: “Have you seen? Ah! my daughter, courage, patience in the state in which you are; since justice wants to pours itself upon creatures, it refrains from pouring itself upon you, and the void of your sufferings will fill the void of their sufferings. Let us give course to justice a little bit – it is necessary; creatures are growing too bold. Then, everything will end, and I will be with you like before.”
October 29, 1907
True love and sacrifice.
As I was in my usual state, I found myself outside of myself, and I saw baby Jesus who, placing Himself on my bed, beat my whole body with His hands, giving me also some kicks. After He beat me well and trampled me, He disappeared. As I returned into myself, I could not understand the reason for this beating; but I was content, remembering that I had drawn closer to Jesus to be beaten more. Then, while feeling all beaten up, I was surprised again by blessed Jesus who, removing the crown of thorns from His head, Himself, drove it into mine, but with such force that all the thorns were driven into me. Then, placing Himself in my interior, almost in the act of moving forward, He told me: “My daughter, how are you doing? Let us go higher, let us go higher in chastising the world.”
I felt frightened on hearing that I was uniting my will to His in going higher with chastisements. And He added: “That which I tell you, you must not forget. Remember that some time ago I showed you the present chastisements, as well as those which I was to send; and you, presenting yourself before my justice, pleaded so much for mankind, offering yourself to suffer anything, that it was conceded to you, as alms, that instead of doing ‘ten’, out of regard for you it would do ‘five’. This is why this morning I beat you – to be able to give you your intent: that, though having to do ten, I do five.”
Then He added: “My daughter, love is that which ennobles the soul and gives her possession of all my riches, because true love tolerates no division of any kind, even though one may be inferior to the other. ‘What is mine is yours’: this is the language of two beings who really love each other, because true love is transformation. So, the beauty of one removes the ugliness of the other, and renders him beautiful; if one is poor, I make him rich; if ignorant, I make him learned; if wretched, I make him noble. One is the heartbeat, one the breath, one the will in two beings that love each other; and if any other heartbeat or breath wanted to enter into them, they feel suffocated, breathless and torn, and they become ill. So, true love is health and sanctity, and one breathes a balsamic and fragrant air, which is the breath and the life of love itself. But it is in sacrifice that this love is more ennobled, more strengthened, more confirmed and expanded. So, love is the flame, sacrifice is the wood. Where there is more wood, the flames are higher, and the fire is always greater.
What is sacrifice? It is to empty oneself out in the love and in the being of the beloved; and the more one sacrifices himself, the more he is consumed in the being of the beloved, losing his own, and acquiring all the features and the nobility of the Divine Being. See, it is so also in the natural world, though very imperfect: who acquires a name, nobility, heroism? – a soldier who sacrifices himself, who exposes himself in battle, who lays down his life for love of the king, or another who stands arms akimbo? Certainly the first one. The same for a servant: who can hope to sit at the table of his master? – the faithful servant who sacrifices himself, who lays down his life, who has greater care for the interests of his master than for his own, out of love for his master; or the servant who, though he fulfills his duty, when he can shun the sacrifice, shuns it? Certainly the first one. The same for a son with his father, for a friend with his friend, and so with all the rest. Therefore, love ennobles and unites, and forms one single thing; sacrifice is the wood to make the fire of love grow; obedience, then, orders everything.”
November 3, 1907
The soul in the Divine Will must concur in everything.
This morning, as I was in my usual state, I felt Him move in my interior, repeating: “Let us go higher….”
On hearing this, I shrugged my shoulders, saying: ‘Lord, why do You say, “Let us go higher”? Say, rather, “I will go higher with chastisements” – I am afraid to put my will into it.’ And He: “My daughter, my Will and yours are one, and if I say ‘let us go higher with chastisements’, do I not say the same in the good I do to creatures which surpasses - oh, by far! - the chastisements? Also, are you not united with Me in the many other chastisements which I do not send? So, one who is united in good, should he not be united in mortifications? Between Me and you there must be no division. You are nothing but tiny little grass which God delighted in endowing with a marvelous virtue; and just as one who does not know the virtue that this tiny little grass contains, tramples it and does not even look at it, in the same way, one who does not know the gift which I have placed in you and the virtue which my little grass contains, not only tramples you, but does not understand how I delight in giving value to the littlest things.”
After this, He seemed to lean His head upon mine, and I said: ‘O please! Let me feel your thorns.’ And He: “Do you want Me to beat you?” And I: ‘Yes’. At that moment, a rod armed with balls of fire found itself in the hand of Jesus, and I, seeing the fire: ‘Lord, I am afraid of fire - beat me only with the rod.’ And He: “You don’t want to be beaten, and I am going away.’ And He disappeared without giving me the time to pray Him to beat me as He pleased. Oh, how concerned and afflicted I remained! But He, who is so good, will forgive me.
November 18, 1907
By living her nothingness, the soul is filled with God.
As I was in my usual state, blessed Jesus came for just a little, and as soon as I saw Him, I said: ‘My sweet life, how bad I have become – I feel I am reduced to nothing. I no longer feel anything in me, everything is empty; I just feel an enchantment in my interior, and in this enchantment I wait for You, so that You may fill me. But in vain do I wait for this filling; on the contrary, I feel I always return to nothing.’ And Jesus: “Ah, my daughter! And you afflict yourself for you feel reduced to nothing? Rather, I say to you: the more the creature is reduced to nothing, the more she is filled with the All. And if she left even one shadow of herself, that shadow would prevent Me from giving all of Myself, completely, to the soul. Your constant returning to nothing means that you are dissolving your human being to reacquire the Divine.”
November 21, 1907
Love and union between Creator and creature.
Continuing in my usual state, I was uniting myself with Our Lord, making His thought, His heartbeat, His breath and all of His movements one with mine, and then adding the intention of going to all creatures, to give all this to all. And since I was united to Jesus in the Garden of Olives, I also gave to all and to each one, and also to the purging souls, the drops of His blood, His prayers, His pains and all the good He did, so that all the breaths, movements and heartbeats of creatures might be repaired, purified, divinized; and I gave the fount of all goods, which are His pains, as remedies for all. While I was doing this, blessed Jesus told me in my interior: “My daughter, with these intentions of yours, you wound Me continuously; and since you do them often, one arrow does not wait for another, and I am always wounded again.”
And I said: ‘How can it be possible that You are wounded, when You hide and make me suffer so much in waiting for your coming? Are these the wounds – is this the love You have for me?’ And He: “Rather, I have said nothing of all I should tell you. The soul herself, while she is a pilgrim, cannot comprehend all the good and love that passes between creatures and Creator; that her operating, speaking, suffering is all in my life, and that only by acting in this way can she do good to all. I will just tell you that each thought, heartbeat and movement of yours, each member of yours, any suffering bone of yours, are as many lights that come out from you; and as they touch Me I melt them for the good of all, while I send back to you, tripled, as many other lights of grace; and in Heaven I will give them to you of glory. It is enough to tell you that there is such union, such closeness, that the Creator is the organ, and the creature is the sound; the Creator the sun, the creature the rays; the Creator the flower, the creature the fragrance. Can one perhaps be without the other? Certainly not. Do you think that I do not take into account all your interior work and your pains? How can I forget them if they come from my very Self, and are one thing with Me? I also add that every time my Passion is remembered, since it is a treasure exposed for the good of all, it is as if one put it on a counter, to multiply it and distribute it for the good of all.”
November 23, 1907
If the soul suffers distractions at Communion, it is a sign that she has not given herself completely to God.
Having heard from someone that she would get easily distracted at Communion, I was saying in my interior: ‘How is it possible to get distracted while being with You? Does one perhaps not remain all absorbed in You?’ Now, finding myself in my usual state, I was doing my usual interior things, and it was as if I could see some distractions wanting to enter into me, and blessed Jesus put His hands in front of them and did not let them in. Then He told me: “My daughter, if the soul suffers distractions and disturbances, it is a sign that she has not given herself completely to Me. In fact, when the soul has given herself completely to Me, since she is my own thing, I know how to keep my gift in good custody; but when they do not give Me everything, because of their free will I cannot keep that special custody, and they are forced to suffer importuning things, which disturb my union with them. On the other hand, when the soul is all mine, she makes no effort to remain calm; the commitment is all mine to let nothing enter which may disturb our union.”
In all of her acts, the soul must have the intention of encountering Jesus.
As I was in my usual state, I found myself with the thought of when blessed Jesus met His blessed Mother on the way to Calvary; and while I was compassionating both one and the other, sweet Jesus told me: “My daughter, my Mother went out on the day of my Passion only to be able meet and relieve Her Son. In the same way, for a true loving soul, her intention in all of her actions is only that of encountering her beloved, and of relieving Him from the weight of His cross. And since human life is a continuous attitude of actions, both external and internal, the soul does nothing but meet her beloved continuously. And will she just meet Him? No, no; she will greet Him, she will embrace Him. She kisses Him, she consoles Him, she loves Him, be it even with a little word said in passing; and He will be satisfied and content. And since the action always contains a sacrifice, if the action is done to encounter the sacrifice contained in it, it will serve to relieve Me from the weight of my cross. What will be the happiness of this soul who, in her actions, is always in contact with Me? How my Love will grow ever more at each additional encounter she has by means of her acting with Me! But, how few are those who make use of it to find the shortest way in their actions to come to Me, cling to Me, and relieve Me from the many afflictions that creatures give Me!”
January 23, 1908
Jesus never goes to the soul uselessly. Temporizing gives time and space to the enemies to wage battle.
As M. came, he told me that in these comings of Our Lord I did not deserve anything, and that I only deserved something when I practiced the virtues; and he also told me to pray for certain needs of his. Then, during the course of the day I was concerned about what I had heard, and in order to snap out of it I said to myself: ‘My adorable Good, You know that I have never cared about merits, but only about loving You. It seems that they want to make me a servant in your house, as if I cared about gains. No, I don’t want to be servant, but daughter – even more, You my beloved, and I, Yours.’ But in spite of this, that thought would come back very often. Now, as I found myself in my usual state, my blessed Jesus came and told me: “My daughter, M. did not tell you the truth, because when I go to a soul, I never go uselessly, but I always bring her some usefulness - now I speak to her about virtues, now I correct her, now I communicate my beauty to her, in such a way that all other things appear ugly to her - and many other things. And even if I did not say anything to her, it is certain that love develops more in the soul, and the more she loves Me, the more I come to love her in return; and the merits of love are so great, noble and divine, that compared to other merits, those could be called lead, and these pure gold. Besides, he himself came, and indeed he did not come like a statue – he tried to say some words, and to do some good to you, though as a creature; and then I who am the Creator, would do useless things?”
At that moment, I remembered the needs that M. had told me, and I prayed Our Lord to answer him. In the meantime, I seemed to see him with a silver-colored garment; a black veil descended from his head, covering part of his eyes, and this veil seemed to communicate itself to another person who was behind him. I could not understand anything of this, and blessed Jesus told me: “The silver-colored garment that you see on him is his purity in operating, and the black veil is the ‘human’ that he mixes with it. This human that he mixes is like a veil which, covering the light of truth that shines in his mind, sometimes makes him act with fear, or to content someone else, and not according to the truth which my Grace makes shine in his mind.”
And I: ‘Lord, grant him what he told me, for it is something that regards your glory very much.’ And He: “For an irresolute soul, temporizing gives time and space to the enemies to wage battle; while by not giving them time, and by showing oneself resolute and unshakeable, the doors are closed to the enemies, and one has the good of not even exposing oneself to the brawl. So, if he wants to reach his goal quickly, these are the means, and I will be with him, and he will be victorious. And then, the very ones who are most opposed to him will be the most supportive, and will admire him the most, seeing that he has undone their human views.”
February 6, 1908
Signs to know whether the soul is in Grace.
As I was in my usual state, blessed Jesus came for just a little and told me: “My daughter, the sign to know whether a soul is in my Grace is that, as my Grace communicates Itself to her, the soul is ready to execute what Grace wants, in such a way that the Grace which was already in her interior and that which communicates Itself afterwards hold hands and, united with the will of the soul, place themselves in the attitude of operating. If then she is not ready, there is much to doubt about. Grace is symbolized by electric current, which turns on only those things where preparations have been made to receive the electric current. But where these preparations are not present, or some wires are broken or consumed, even though there is current, the light cannot communicate itself.” And He disappeared.
February 7, 1908
Life is a weight that will turn into a treasure.
Continuing in my usual state, I was thinking about the enormous weight that blessed Jesus felt in carrying the cross, and I said to myself: ‘Lord, life too is a weight – but what a weight, especially because You, my highest Good, are far away. At that moment, He came and told me: “My daughter, it is true that life is a weight, but when this weight is carried with Me, and one finds out that at the end of his life he can unload this weight within Me, he will find this weight changed into a treasure, in which he will find gems, precious stones, diamonds and all riches, such as to make him happy for eternity.”
February 9, 1908
The way the soul must be with Jesus. Necessity of love for Jesus.
Having received Communion, I was saying: ‘Lord, keep me always clasped to You, for I am too little, and if You do not keep me clasped, because I am little, I may get lost.’ And He: “I want to teach you the way you must be with Me: first, you must enter into Me, transform yourself in Me, and take what you find in Me. Second, once you have filled yourself completely with Me, go out and operate together with Me, as if you and I were one single thing, in such a way that if I move, you move as well; if I think, you think of the same thing of which I am thinking – in sum, whatever I do, you do as well. Third, with these acts that we have done together, move away from Me for one instant, and go into the midst of creatures, giving to all and to each one everything we have done together – that is, giving my divine life to each one, and then quickly returning into Me to give Me, in the name of all, all the glory that they should give Me, praying, excusing them, repairing, loving… Ah, yes! Love Me for all, satiate Me with love! There are no passions in Me, but if there could be any passion, it would be only this and this alone: love. But love in Me is more than passion – it is my life; and if passions can be destroyed, life cannot. See the necessity of being loved in which I find Myself. Therefore, love Me, love Me.”
February 12, 1908
In one day a courageous soul does more than a timid one does in one year.
As I was in my usual state, blessed Jesus came for just a little and told me: “My daughter, timidity represses Grace and hampers the soul. A timid soul will never be good at operating great things, either for God, or for her neighbor, or for herself. When a soul is timid, it is as if she had her legs tied: unable to walk freely, she always has her eyes fixed on herself, and on the effort she makes in order to walk. Timidity makes her keep her eyes low, never high. In operating, she draws her strength not from God, but from herself, and therefore, instead of becoming stronger, she becomes weaker. If Grace sows, it happens to It as to a poor farmer who, having sown and worked his little field, harvests little or nothing. On the other hand, in one day a courageous soul does more than a timid one does in one year.”
February 16, 1908
How the cross is the surest sign to know whether we love the Lord.
As I was in my usual state, I was thinking about why it is the cross alone that makes us know whether we really love the Lord, while there are many other things, like the virtues, prayer, the Sacraments, which could make us know whether we love the Lord. While I was thinking of this, blessed Jesus came and told me: “My daughter, it is really so, the cross alone is that which makes one know whether he really loves the Lord - but a cross carried with patience and resignation, because where there is patience and resignation in crosses, there is divine life. Since nature is so reluctant to suffering, if there is patience, it cannot be something natural, but divine, and the soul no longer loves the Lord with her love alone, but united with the love of the divine life. So, what doubt can she have whether she loves or not, if she arrives at loving Him with His own love?
On the other hand, in the other things, and even in the very Sacraments, there also may be someone who loves, who contains this divine life within himself, but these things cannot give the certainty of the cross. It may be there, or it may not, because of lack of dispositions. One can very well go to Confession, but if he lacks the dispositions, it certainly cannot be said that he loves and that he has received this divine life within himself. Another may receive Communion; indeed he receives the divine life, but he can only say that this divine life remains within him if he had the true dispositions. In fact, it can be seen how some receive Communion or go to Confession, but as occasions arise, the patience of divine life cannot be seen in them; and if patience is missing, love is missing because love is recognized only through sacrifice. And so here are the doubts; while the cross, patience, resignation, are fruits produced only by Grace and by love.”
March 9, 1908
The lives of all palpitated in the Heart of Jesus.
Continuing in my usual state, blessed Jesus came for just a little, and He seemed to draw near me, letting me hear the beats of His Heart – but so very strongly; and many other little heartbeats palpitated in His heartbeat. He told me: “My daughter, this is the state in which my Heart found Itself in the act of my Passion. All human lives palpitated in my Heart, which, with their sins, were all in the attitude of giving Me death; and my Heart, in spite of their ingratitude, taken by violence of love, gave back life to all. This is why I palpitated so strongly, and in my heartbeat I enclosed all human heartbeats, making them rise again into heartbeats of grace, of love and of divine delights.” And He disappeared.
In addition to this, having spent a day with many visits, I was feeling tired, and in my interior I was lamenting to Our Lord, saying: “Move creatures away from me; I feel very oppressed – I don’t know what they find or want from me. Have pity on the violence I do myself continuously, to be with You in my interior and with creatures externally.’ At that moment, the Queen Mama came, and raising her right hand, pointing to my interior, in which there seemed to be lovable Jesus, told me: “My beloved daughter, do not oppress yourself, creatures run to where there is a treasure. And since in you there is the treasure of sufferings, in which my sweet Son is enclosed, they come to you. You, however, while dealing with them - do not get distracted from your treasure, making each one love the treasure you contain within you, which is the cross and my Son. In this way, you will send them back all enriched.”
March 13, 1908
The warmth of the union with Jesus dispels from the soul the cold of human inclinations.
While I was in my usual state, a demon came who did strange things, but as soon as he disappeared I no longer thought about it, to the point of forgetting about his strange behavior, occupying myself with my highest and only good. Later, however, a thought came to me: ‘How bad and insipid I am – nothing makes an impression on me.’ And blessed Jesus told me: “My daughter, there are certain regions in which the plants are not subject to cold, to frost, to snow, and therefore they are not stripped of their leaves, flowers and fruits; and if they take some breaks, it is for a short time, so that when their fruits are picked, there may be the necessary time for others to grow. In fact, warmth fecundates them in an admirable way, and they are not subject to slowness, as the plants in cold regions. These poor plants, because of frost and snow, for long months are subject to producing very few fruits, and for a very short time, almost tiring the patience of the farmer who has to pick them.
Such are the souls who have reached union with Me: the warmth of my union dispels from them the cold of human inclinations which, like cold, renders them sterile and stripped of leaves and of divine fruits. The frosts of passions, the snows of disturbances, block the fruits of Grace in the soul. But since they remain in the shadow of their union with Me, nothing makes an impression on them any more, nothing enters into their interior which may disturb our union and our rest; the whole of their lives turns within my center. So, their inclination, their passion, is for God; and if sometimes there is a little break, it is nothing but a simple hiding of Myself in order to give them a surprise of greater consolations, and therefore be able to enjoy in them more delicious fruits of patience and of heroism, which they have exercised during my hiding.
All the opposite happens to imperfect souls: they really seem like plants born in cold regions; they are subject to all impressions; so, their lives live more from impressions than from reason and virtue. Inclinations, passions, temptations, disturbances and all the events of life are like colds, snows, frosts, hails, which prevent the development of my union with them; and when it seems that they have had a beautiful flowering, a new failure, something that upsets them, is enough to make this beautiful flowering wither and fall to the ground. So, they are always at the beginning; they produce very few fruits, and they almost tire my patience in cultivating them.”
March 15, 1908
When souls are all filled with God, storms have no strength to agitate them even slightly.
This morning, I was feeling more than ever oppressed because of the privation of my highest and only good, but at the same time I was placid, without those anxieties that used to make me go round through Heaven and earth, and only when I would find Him, then would I stop. So I was saying to myself: ‘What a change – I feel petrified from the pain of your absence, yet, I do not cry, I feel a profound peace that invests me completely; not a contrary breath enters into me.’ At that moment, blessed Jesus came and told me: “My daughter, do not want to trouble yourself. You must know that when there is a strong storm in the sea, where the waters are deep the storm is only superficial. The depths of the sea are in the most perfect calm, the waters remain tranquil, and the fish, when they detect the storm, go to nest where the water is deeper so as to be safer. So, the whole storm unloads itself where the sea contains very little water, because since there is little water, the storm has the strength to agitate it from top to bottom, and even to transport it elsewhere, to other points of the sea.
So it happens to souls when they are completely filled with God - up to the brim, up to overflowing outside: storms have no strength to upset them even slightly, because there is no strength that can defy God; at the most, they may feel it superficially. Even more, as the soul detects the storm, she puts the virtues in order, and goes to nest in the inmost depths of God. So, while externally there seems to be a storm, it is completely false – it is then that the soul enjoys more peace, and rests, tranquil, in the bosom of God, just like the fish in the bosom of the sea.
All the opposite for the souls who are empty of God, or contain just a little bit of God: storms agitate them all over; and if they have a little bit of God, they waste it. Nor does it take strong storms to agitate them; the slightest wind is enough to make virtues flee from them. Even more, holy things themselves, which form a delicious pasture for those former souls who enjoy them to their fill, for these souls, turn into storms. They are knocked about by all the winds; from no side is it ever dead calm for them, because reason demands that where the whole of God is not, the inheritance of peace is far away from them.”
March 22, 1908
The state of Luisa is a state of continuous prayer, of sacrifice and of union with God.
Continuing in my usual state, I found myself outside of myself and I seemed to see M. and other priests. Then, a young man of divine beauty came, who drew near me and gave me some food, and I prayed him to share that food which he was giving me, with M. and others. So, drawing near M., he gave him a good share of it, saying to him: “I share my food with you, and you – satisfy my hunger by giving me souls”, pointing to the work which M. wants to do, and also exciting him strongly in his interior, by giving him impulses and inspirations. Then he shared it with others.
In the meantime, a venerable lady came out, and those who had received food from the young man drew around her and asked her what my state was. And the lady answered: “The state of this soul is a state of continuous prayer, of sacrifice and of union with God; and while being in this state, she is exposed to all the events of the Church, of the world and of the justice of God, praying, repairing, disarming and preventing, as much as she can, the chastisements which justice wants to unload upon creatures. So, things are all suspended.”
Now, while hearing this, I said to myself: ‘I am so bad, yet they say that this is my state.’ But in spite of this, I found myself near a little window up high, and from it I could see all that was being done in the Church and in the world, and the scourges which were about to fall. But who could tell them all? I move on, so as not to be too long. And I – oh, how I moaned and prayed! I would have wanted to tear myself to pieces in order to prevent all this. But all of a sudden, everything disappeared and I found myself inside myself.
March 25, 1908
Temptations can be conquered easily. Where there is passion, the devil has more strength.
Continuing in my usual state, blessed Jesus came for just a little and told me: “Daughter, temptations can be conquered easily, because the devil is the most cowardly creature that can exist, and a contrary act, a contempt, a prayer, are enough to make him flee. In fact, these acts render him even more cowardly than he is, and in order not to bear that confusion, as soon as he sees the soul resolute in not wanting to pay attention to his cowardice, he flees terrified.
Now, if the soul cannot easily free herself, it means that it is not only a temptation, but a passion rooted within the soul, which tyrannizes her together with the temptation. Therefore, she is unable to free herself; and where there is passion, the devil has more strength to make fun of the soul.”
March 29, 1908
Peaceful souls are the delight of God.
This morning, on coming, blessed Jesus seemed to carry a black mantle; and drawing near me, He seemed to place me under it, saying: “In this way I will envelop all creatures, as within a black mantle.” And He disappeared.
I remained concerned because of some chastisement, and I prayed Him to come back, for I could no longer be without Him; but I was as though bothered by that sight from before. Then, after much hardship, He came, carrying a cup filled with some liqueur. He gave me some to drink, and then He added: “My daughter, peaceful souls eat at my same table and drink at my cup, and the Divine Archer does nothing but dart through them continuously, and no dart is wasted. All of them – all of them wound the loving soul; and the soul faints, while the Divine Archer continues with His arrows which now make her die of love, now give her back new life of love. And from her wounds, the soul shoots her darts to wound the One who has so much wounded her. So, a peaceful soul is the delight and the amusement of God; while, with turbid souls, if the Divine Archer darts through them, the darts are wasted by the soul, leaving Him embittered, and forming the diabolical amusement and taste.”
April 5, 1908
All that the Queen Mama contains has its origin in the Fiat.
Continuing in my usual state, I found myself outside of myself, within a garden, in which I could see the Queen Mama placed on a very high throne. I yearned to go up there to kiss Her hand, and as I tried to go, She came to meet me, giving me a smacking kiss on my face. In looking at Her, I saw as though a globe of light in Her interior, and within that light there was the word ‘Fiat’. From that word descended many different unending seas of virtues, graces, greatnesses, glory, joys, beauties, and everything that our Queen Mama contains as a whole. Everything was rooted in that Fiat, and all of Her goods took their origin from the Fiat. Oh, omnipotent, fecund, holy Fiat! Who can comprehend you? I feel mute… It is so great that I can say nothing; therefore I stop here.
So I looked at Her with amazement, and She said to me: “My daughter, all of my Sanctity came out from within the word ‘Fiat’. I did not move even for one breath, one step, one action, or anything at all, if not within the Will of God. My life, my food, my all, was the Will of God; and this produced such sanctity, riches, glories, honors for Me… not human, but Divine. So, the more the soul is united, identified with the Will of God, the more she can be called holy, and she is loved more by God. And the more she is loved, the more she is favored, because her life is nothing but the product of the Will of God. How can He not love her if she is His own thing? Therefore, one must not look at how much or how little he does, but rather, at whether it is wanted by God. In fact, the Lord looks more at something little, if it is according to His Will, than at something great, without It.”
April 8, 1908
The Divine Will is continuous communion. How to know whether a state is Will of God.
I was concerned because I was not able to receive Communion every day, and good Jesus, on coming, told me: “My daughter, I do not want you to be bothered by anything. It is true that having Communion is a great thing, but how long does the tight union with the soul last? A quarter of an hour at the most. But the thing you should cherish the most is the complete undoing of your will in Mine, because for one who lives of my Will, there is tight union not only for a quarter of an hour, but always - always. My Will is continuous communion with the soul; so, not once a day, but every hour and every moment is always communion for one who does my Will.”
I have gone through most bitter days because of the privation of my highest and only Good, thinking and fearing that my state might be a pretense. Being in bed without movement or occupation until the coming of the confessor - and without that usual doziness - tormented me and martyred me so much, to the extent of making me fall ill for the pain and the continuous tears. More than once I begged the confessor to give me permission and obedience to sit on the bed according to my habit, and do my usual work of ‘tombolo’, if I were not dozy and if Jesus Christ were not pleased to let me share, as victim, in one of the mysteries of His Passion. But he continuously and absolutely prohibited it to me. Rather, he added that this state of mine, although I was deprived of my highest Good, was to be considered as state of victim, because of the violence and the pain of the privation itself and of obedience.
I always obeyed, but the martyrdom of my heart was constantly saying to me: ‘Isn’t this a pretense? Where is your doziness? Where, your state of victim? And what do you suffer of the mysteries of the Passion? Get up, get up, don’t make pretenses! Work, work! Don’t you see that this pretense will lead you to damnation? And you - don’t you tremble? Don’t you think of the terrible judgment of God? Don’t you see that after so many years you have done nothing but dig your own abyss from which you will never get out for eternity?’ Oh God! Who can say the ripping of my heart and the cruel sufferings that tormented my soul, crushing me and throwing me into a sea of pains? But tyrant obedience did not allow me even one atom of my own will. May the Divine Will be done, which disposes this way.
While in the midst of these cruel torments, last night, as I was in my usual state, I found myself surrounded by some people who were saying: “Recite a ‘Pater, Ave, Gloria’ in honor of Saint Francis of Paola, who will bring you some refreshment for your sufferings.” So I recited it; and as I did so, the Saint appeared, bringing me a little loaf of bread. He gave it to me, saying: “Eat it.”
I ate it, and felt all strengthened. Then I said to him: ‘Dear Saint, I would like to tell you something.’ And he, all affability: “Tell me, what would you like to say?”
And I: ‘I fear very much that my state may not be Will of God. Listen: in the first years of this illness, which occurred at intervals, I would feel Our Lord calling me to become a victim; at the same time I would be caught by internal sufferings and wounds, such that externally it appeared that I was having a fit. Now, I fear that it was my fantasy that produced these evils.’
And the Saint: “The sure sign to know whether a state is Will of God is that the soul is ready to do otherwise, if she knew that the Will of God was no longer that state.”
Not persuaded, I added: ‘Dear Saint, I have not told you everything. Listen: the first ones were at intervals; then, from the time when Our Lord called me to continuous immolation, it is twenty-one years since I have been always in bed – and who can tell my tribulations? Sometimes it seems that He leaves me, He takes suffering away from me, the only and faithful friend of my state; and I remain crushed without God, and even without the support of suffering… and so, doubts and fears that my state may not be the Will of God.’
And he, all sweetness: “I repeat to you what I have said to you before: if you are ready to do the Will of God, if you knew It, then your state is His Will.’
Now, I very much feel within my soul that if I knew the Will of God with all clarity, I would be ready to follow this Holy Volition at the cost of my life. So I remained more tranquil. May the Lord be always thanked.
May 3, 1908
Effects of the circulation of the Divine Will in the soul.
Continuing in my usual state, I felt Our Lord near me for just a little, and He told me: “My daughter, with the soul who does my Will, my Will circulates in her whole being like blood. So, she is in continuous contact with Me, with my power, wisdom, charity, beauty – she takes part in all that is mine. As she no longer lives of her own volition, her volition lives in Mine; and as Mine circulates in hers, hers circulates in all of my Being, and I feel her continuous contact. And as I feel touched by her continuously, you cannot comprehend how drawn I feel to love her, to favor her, to answer her in everything she asks - if I denied it, I would deny it to Myself. Besides, all things considered, since she lives in my Will, she asks for nothing but what I Myself want. This is what she wants, and this alone makes her happy, for herself and for others, because her life is more in Heaven than on earth. This is the fruit that my Will produces – to beatify her in advance.”
May 12, 1908
With their bad example, the rich have poisoned the poor.
Continuing in my usual state, I was praying to Our Lord that He would concede to put peace in the hearts, which are all in discord – the poor want to attack the rich; there is such turmoil, a thirst for human blood… It seems that they themselves can no longer contain themselves. If the Lord does not put His hand in, we are already close to the chastisements which many times He has manifested. Then, He came for just a little and told me: “My daughter, a just Justice Mine is. The rich have been the first to give a bad example to the poor, the first to move away from religion, from fulfilling their duties, to the point of feeling ashamed to enter a church, to attend Mass, to perform their obligation. The poor have nourished themselves with their poisonous slobber; and having fed themselves well with the poison of their bad example, with that same poison given by them, unable to contain it, they try to attack them and even to kill them. There is no order without subjection; the rich have subtracted themselves from God, and the peoples rebel against God, against the rich, and against everyone. The scale of my Justice is full, and I can no longer contain it.”
May 15, 1908
She sees wars and revolutions.
As I was in my usual state, I found myself outside of myself, in the midst of revolutions. It seems that they are ever more obstinate in wanting to shed blood. I prayed to the Lord, and He told me: “My daughter, two are the storms which men are preparing – one against the government, and the other against the Church.”
In the meantime, I seemed to see fleeing leaders, the king at risk of being made a prisoner, and trying to flee… I cannot say it well – it seemed that he was falling into the hands of the enemies. All the rich were undergoing grave dangers, and some were dying. That which was most sorrowful is that among the leaders of revolutions, also against the Church, priests were not lacking. Then, when things were reaching the extreme excesses, a foreign power seemed to intervene. I will not continue further, because these are things said other times.
June 22, 1908
The Divine Will triumphs over everything.
This morning, I was feeling very oppressed because of the privation of my adorable Jesus, and I said to myself: ‘I cannot take anymore – how can I go on without my life? What patience it takes with You! What would be the virtue that would induce Him to come?’ At that moment, He came and told me: “My daughter, the virtue that triumphs over everything, that conquers everything, levels everything, sweetens everything, is the Will of God, because It contains such power that nothing can resist It."
While He was saying this, a road, all full of rocks, thorns and steep mountains, appeared before me. Once all this was placed in the Will of God, by the power of It the rocks were pulverized, the thorns were changed into flowers, the mountains leveled. So, in the Will of God all things have one same appearance; they all assume the same color. May His Most Holy Will be always blessed.
June 31, 1908
The true spirit of charity in the rich and in priests.
Continuing in my usual state, full of bitternesses and of privations, after much hardship I seemed to see peoples in the act of rebelling and of intensifying the brawl against the rich. In the meantime, the lament of most sweet Jesus made itself heard in my ear, all embittered, saying: “I am the one who is giving freedom to the poor - I am tired of the rich. They have done enough - how much money wasted on balls, on theatricals, on useless trips, on vanities, and even on sins! And the poor? They could not have enough bread to satisfy their hunger; they were oppressed, weary, embittered. Had they given them only what they spent on unnecessary things, my poor would have been happy. But the rich have kept them like a family that did not belong to them; even more, they have despised them, keeping comforts and amusements for themselves as things befitting their condition, and leaving the poor in misery, as something befitting their condition.”
And while saying this, He seemed to withdraw grace from the poor, and these would become enraged against the rich, in such a way that grave things would happen. On seeing this, I said: ‘My dear Life and my all Good, it is true that there are some bad rich people, but there are also some good ones, like the many devout ladies who give alms to the churches, and your priests who do so much good to all…’
“Ah! my daughter, keep quiet, and don’t touch this key, so very sorrowful for Me. I could say that I do not recognize these devout ladies. They give alms where they want, to obtain their intent, to hold people at their service; they spend even thousands of lire for those who sympathize with them, but then, where it is necessary, they do not deign to give a cent. Could I say that they do it for Me? Could I recognize these actions of theirs? You yourself can recognize whether they do it for Me from these signs – if they are ready for any bare necessity; if they do not differentiate by giving much where it is not so necessary, and refusing to give little where it is necessary. One can well say that there is no spirit of true charity or upright operating. So, my poor are put into oblivion also by these devout ladies. And the priests? Ah! my daughter – that is even worse. They do good to all?! You deceive yourself. They do good to the rich; they have time for the rich. By them also the poor are almost excluded; for the poor they have no time; for the poor they have not a word of comfort or help to tell them; they send them away, reaching the point of pretending they are ill. I could say that if the poor have moved away from the Sacraments, the priests have contributed to this, because they have always taken their time to confess them, and the poor grew tired and no longer came back. But then, if a rich person would show up, it is all the opposite: they would not hesitate one instant; time, words, comforts, help…, they would find anything for the rich. Could I say that the priests have a spirit of true charity, if they reach the point of picking the ones to whom they should listen? And what about the others? They either send them somewhere else, or oppress them so much, that if my grace did not help the poor in a special way, the poor would have been banished from my Church. True charity and upright spirit – only rarely do some priests have them, but as for the rest, I could say that these have departed from the earth.”
I remained embittered more than ever, imploring mercy.
July 26, 1908
Continuing in my usual state, blessed Jesus came for just a little and told me: “My daughter, obedience is the ark of my dwelling in the soul. Where this ark of obedience is not present, I can say that there is no place for Me in that soul, and I am forced to remain outside.”
August 10, 1908
The work of Love.
Continuing in my usual state, but full of bitternesses and of privations, after I received Communion I was lamenting to blessed Jesus about the way He had left me, and about the uselessness of my state. And He, having compassion on my laments, told me: “My daughter, nothing has diminished the goods that exist between Me and you, because the whole of good is in the origin of its foundation. When two persons unite themselves with the bond of friendship or with the bond of marriage, and they have exchanged gifts besides, and have loved each other so much as to become inseparable, to the extent that one has taken and copied the other so much as to feel the being of the beloved within herself – if out of bare necessity they are forced to be far away from each other, are those gifts perhaps diminished, or does their love decrease? Not at all. On the contrary, being far away makes them grow more in love, and makes them keep the gifts received with greater care, waiting for some greater unexpected gift at the return of the other. But there is more; since one has copied her beloved within herself, it seems that there is no distance for her, because she feels the voice of the beloved flow within her voice, having imitated him. She feels him flow in her mind, in her works, in her steps… So, he is far and near, she looks at him and he escapes her, she touches him but cannot clasp him; therefore, the soul is in a continuous martyrdom of love. Now, if Justice forces Me to deprive you of Me and to be far away for some time, can you say that I have taken the gifts away from you, and that there is diminution of love?”
And I: ‘My state is too hard, my dear Life – and what am I here for if You do not let Me suffer to spare my neighbor the chastisements? You have said many times that You would not allow rain – and it is not raining; so, I cannot beat You in anything. Whatever You say, You do; while if I had You near Me like before, I would tell You so much that You would let me win. How can You say that distance is nothing?’
And He: “It is precisely because of this that I am forced to be far away – so as not to let you win, but give course to Justice. However, by keeping you here there is also some good, because the lack of water will call for famine; during this time the peoples will be humiliated, and after slaughters and wars have taken place, grace will find them more disposed to be saved. Is this not also a good, that while wars were about to overtake the famine, by keeping you here they will be postponed for a little longer, and so more souls will be saved?”
Then He added: “Love never says ‘enough’. Even if Love scourged the soul and tore her to pieces, those pieces would cry out Love. Love never says ‘enough’; It is not yet content – It pulverizes those pieces, It reduces them to nothing, and into that nothing It blows Its fire, and gives it Its own shape. It mixes nothing human, but only the divine; and it is then that Love sings Its glories, Its braveries, Its prodigies, saying: ‘I am content – my love has won; it has destroyed the human and built the divine.’ It happens to Love as to a talented artisan who, having many objects which are not to his liking, breaks them to pieces, puts them on the fire, and keeps them there until they melt, making them lose all of their shape; and then he forms from them many other objects, most beautiful and pleasant, worthy of his talent. It is yet true that for that which is human this action of Love is so very hard, but when the soul sees her gain, she will see how beauty has taken the place of ugliness, richness of poverty, nobility of roughness; and she too will sing the glories of Love.”
August 14, 1908
The human will serves as brush for Jesus in order to portray His image in the heart.
Having received Communion, I could see the Baby within my interior, as though looking for something important; and I said: ‘My pretty little one, what are You looking for with so much zeal? And He said: “Daughter, I am looking for the brush of your will to be able to portray my image in your heart. In fact, if you do not give me your will, I lack the brush to be able to portray Myself freely in you; and just as your will serves as brush in my hands, love serves as colors in order to impress the variety of colors of my image. Moreover, just as the human will serves as brush for Me, my Will serves as brush in the hands of the soul in order to portray her image in my Heart; in Me, then, she will find abundant color of love for the variety of colors.”
August 19, 1908
The soul must sow good with her whole being.
Having done my meditation on the fact that one who sows good will harvest good, and one who sows vices will harvest evils, I was thinking about what good I could sow, given my position, my misery and inability. At that moment, I felt I was being harvested, and I heard Him say in my interior: “The soul must sow good with her whole being – with all of it. The soul possesses a mental intelligence, and she must apply it to comprehend God, to think of good alone, never allowing any bad seed to enter her mind; and this is the sowing of good with the mind. The same with her mouth: she must never sow any bad seed, that is, bad words, unworthy of a Christian, but always say holy, useful and good words; so here is the sowing of good with the mouth. Then, with her heart she must love God alone, desire God, palpitate for Him, and tend to Him; here is the sowing of good with the heart. Then, with her hands she must do holy works, with her feet she must walk after the examples of Our Lord; and here is another good seed.”
On hearing this, I thought to myself: ‘So, in my position I too can sow good in spite of my extreme misery.’ But I thought of this with a certain fear of the account that the master will ask of me - whether I have sown well; and in my interior I heard Him repeat: “My goodness is so great that great wrong is done by those who make Me known as severe, very demanding and rigorous. Oh, what an affront they give to my Love! I will ask for no other account but of the little field given to them; and I will ask for an account for nothing but to give them the fruit of their harvests. I will give it to the intelligence, for the more it has comprehended Me in life, the more it will comprehend Me in Heaven; and the more it will comprehend Me, the greater the joy and beatitude with which it will be inundated. To the mouth I will give the harvest of the different divine flavors, and its voice will harmonize above all the other Blessed; to the works I will give the harvests of my gifts; and so with all the rest.”
August 23, 1908
The sign to know whether there is guilt in the soul during the privation.
Continuing in my usual state, I was very concerned about the state of my soul, and I said to myself: ‘Who knows what evil there is in my soul that the Lord deprives me of Him, and leaves me abandoned to myself.’
At that moment, He came for just a little and filled all of myself with Him, and my whole being was all directed to Him; there was not even a fiber or a motion that would not tend to Him. Then, afterwards, He told me: “Have you seen, my daughter? The sign that there is guilt in the soul when she finds herself without Me, is that, as I return to let Myself be seen, she does not remain all filled with God, nor is her being immediately disposed to immerse itself completely in Me, in such a way that not a fiber would be left which is not fixed in its Center. Where there is guilt, or something that is not completely mine, neither can I fill her, nor can the soul immerse herself in Me. Guilt, matter, cannot enter into God, nor run toward God. Therefore, calm yourself, and do not want to trouble yourself.”
August 26, 1908
Constancy in good makes Divine Life grow in the soul.
As I was in my usual state, I was all afflicted and almost dazed because of the usual privations. Then He came, just in passing, and told me: “My daughter, that which I want you to take to heart is constancy in good, both internal and external, because the repetition of the act of loving Me, of many interior acts and of constant good, makes Divine Life grow ever more in the soul – but with such energy, that she can be compared to a child who, growing in good air and with healthy foods, keeps growing well, in full health, until he reaches his proper stature, without needing either doctors or medicines. Even more, he is so robust and strong, that he relieves and helps others.
On the other hand, one who is not constant grows like a child who is not always fed with healthy foods and lives in putrid air. He grows sickly, and since his members do not have the strength to develop and grow due to lack of good nourishment, they develop with defects; and so a tumor forms in one place, an abscess in another. He walks with a limp, he speaks with difficulty; one can say that he is a poor cripple. Though one can see good members mixed in, those with defects are more; and even though he consults doctors and takes medicines, they do him little or no good, because his blood is infected by the putrid air, and his members are weak and defective from malnutrition. So, he will be a man, but he will not reach a proper stature, and will always need help, without being able to help others. Such is the inconstant soul. With inconstancy in good, it is as if the soul nourished herself with foods which are not good; and by applying herself to other things which are not God, it is as if she breathed putrid air. So, Divine Life grows with difficulty and poorly, because It lacks the strength and the vigor of constancy.”
September 2, 1908
True virtue begins in God and ends in Him.
I am going through bitter days because of the continuous privations of blessed Jesus. He came for just a little and told me: “My daughter, the sign to know whether one has true charity is that he loves the poor. In fact, if he loves the rich and is available for them, he may do so because he hopes for something or obtains something, or because he is in sympathy with them, or because of their nobility, intelligence, eloquence, and even out of fear. But if he loves the poor, helps them, supports them, it is because he sees in them the image of God, therefore he does not look at roughness, ignorance, rudeness, misery. Through those miseries, as though through a glass, he sees God, from whom he hopes for everything; and so he loves them, helps them, consoles them as if he were doing it to God Himself. This is the good kind of true virtue, which begins from God and ends in God. On the other hand, that which begins from matter, produces matter and ends in matter. As bright and virtuous as charity may appear, if the divine touch is not felt, both the one who does it and the one who receives it become bothered, annoyed and tired, and if necessary, they even use it to commit defects.”
September 3, 1908
Jesus is light, and light is truth.
As I was in my usual state, blessed Jesus made Himself seen all light, and said these simple words: “I am light - but what is light made of? What is the principle of it? It is truth. So, I am light because I am truth. Therefore, in order for the soul to be light and to have light in all of her actions, these must come from truth. Wherever there is artifice, deception and duplicity, there cannot be light - but darkness.” And He disappeared like a flash.
September 5, 1908
As the creature changes, she feels the different effects of the presence of God.
I was speaking with the Confessor, and he was saying: “How terrible it will be to see God indignant! This is so true, that on the Day of Judgment, the wicked will say: ‘Mountains – bury us, destroy us, that we may not see the face of God indignant.” And I was saying: ‘In God there cannot be indignation, but rather, it is according to the state of the soul: if she is good, the divine presence, His qualities, His attributes, attract her whole self within God, and she is consumed with the desire to immerse herself completely in God. If she is bad, His presence crushes her, drives her away from Him; and in seeing herself rejected and not feeling within her any seed of love toward a God so Holy, so Beautiful, while she is so ugly and bad, the soul would rather get rid of His presence, if possible even by destroying herself. So, in God there is no mutation, but rather, we experience different effects according to how we are.’
Afterwards, I thought to myself: ‘How much nonsense I said.’ Then, while I was doing the meditation during the day, He came for just a little and told me: “My daughter, it was well said – I do not change, but it is the creature that feels the different effects of my presence, as she changes. In fact, how can one who loves Me ever fear, if she feels my whole Being flow within her and form her very life? Can she ever fear my Sanctity, if she takes part in Sanctity Itself? Can she ever be ashamed of my Beauty, if she keeps trying to embellish herself ever more in order to please Me and to be like Me? She feels the whole of the Divine Being - all of It, flow in her blood, in her hands, in her feet, in her heart and mind, in such a way that It is something that belongs to her – It is fully her own. And how can It fear or be ashamed of Itself? This is impossible. Ah! my daughter, it is sin that casts so much disorder into the creature, that she reaches the point of wanting to destroy herself so as not to bear my presence. On the Day of Judgment it will be terrible for the wicked. Not seeing any seed of love in themselves, but rather, hate toward Me, my Justice imposes on Me to not love them; and the persons who are not loved, one does not want to keep around, and one makes use of some means to drive them away. I will not want to keep them with Me, and they will not want to stay – we will shun each other. Love alone is that which unites everything and makes all happy.”
September 6, 1908
Jesus wanted to suffer in order to reunite everything to Himself.
Continuing in my usual state, I was thinking about the mystery of the scourging; and as Jesus came, pressing His hand on my shoulders, I heard Him say in my interior: “My daughter, I wanted my flesh to be scattered in pieces, and my Blood to be shed from my whole Humanity, so as to reunite all of dispersed humanity. In fact, of all that was torn from my Humanity – flesh, blood, hair – nothing was dispersed in my Resurrection, but everything was reunited again to my Humanity. By this, I incorporated all creatures within Me. So, after this, if one wanders away from Me, it is out of his obstinate will that he tears himself from Me to go out and be lost.”
September 7, 1908
The more things of which the soul deprives herself down here, the more she will have up there in Heaven.
As I was in my usual state, blessed Jesus came for just a little and told me: “My daughter, the more things of which the soul deprives herself down here, the more she will have up there in Heaven. So, the poorer on earth, the richer in Heaven; the more she is deprived of tastes, pleasures, amusements, trips, strolls on earth, the more tastes and pleasures she will have in God. Oh, how she will stroll in the expanse of the Heavens, especially in the immeasurable Heavens of the attributes of God! In fact, each attribute is one more Heaven, one more Paradise; and among the Blessed – some enter into them as though at the margin of the attributes of God; some walk in the middle of them, some even higher; and the more they walk, the more they taste, enjoy, and amuse themselves. So, one who leaves the earth, takes Heaven, be it even in the smallest thing. Therefore, it follows that the more one is despised, the more he is honored; the smaller, the greater; the more submitted, the more dominant; and so with all the rest. Yet, of the mortals, who thinks of depriving himself of something on earth, to have it eternally in Heaven? Almost no one.”
October 3, 1908
As long as the soul is in the continuous attitude of operating good, Grace is with her.
This morning blessed Jesus made Himself seen - just a shadow, and told me: “My daughter, as long as the soul is in the continuous attitude of operating good, Grace is with her and gives life to all of her actions. If then she is indifferent to doing good, or she is in the act of doing evil, Grace withdraws, because it is not something that belongs to It, and unable to take part in it or to administer Its own life, sorrowful, It departs with great displeasure. Therefore, do you want Grace to be always with you, and my very life to form yours? Then remain in the continuous act of doing good. In this way you will have my whole Being developed in you, and will not have to grieve so much if sometimes you do not have my presence. In fact, you will not see Me, but will touch Me in all your acts; and this will soften, in part, the pain of my privation.”
October 23, 1908
How divine science is in upright operating.
Continuing in my usual state, blessed Jesus came for just a little and told me: “My daughter, all of divine science is contained in upright operating. In fact, that which is upright contains everything beautiful and good that can be found; it contains order, utility, beauty, mastery. A work is good insofar as it is well ordered, but if the threads appear crooked, and placed crookedly, one does not understand anything, and can see nothing but something disorderly, which will be neither useful nor good. This is why, from the greatest to the smallest things I have made, they all appear orderly, and all of them serve a useful purpose – because the fount from which they came was my upright operating. Now, as much as a creature is good, so much divine science she will contain within her; as much as she is upright, so many good things will come from her. A crooked thread in her operating is enough to put herself in disorder as well as the works that come from her, and to obfuscate the divine science that she contains. One who goes out of what is upright, goes out of what is just, holy, beautiful, useful, and goes out of the boundaries in which God placed her; and by going out, she will be like a plant which does not have much soil under it: now the rays of a scorching sun, now frosts or winds, will cause the influence of divine science to wither within her. Such is crooked operating – like frosts, winds, and rays of a scorching sun; so, lacking much soil of divine science, she will do nothing but wither within her own disorder.”
November 20, 1908
When the soul makes love her food, this love becomes solid and serious.
Continuing in my usual state, full of bitternesses and of privations, this morning blessed Jesus came for a little while; I would lament to Him about my state, but instead of answering me, He would draw closer to me. Then, afterwards, without answering what I was saying, He told me: “My daughter, the true loving soul is not content with loving Me with anxiety, with desires, with surges, but when she comes to make love her food and daily nourishment, only then is she content. It is then that love becomes solid, serious, and keeps on losing all that lightness of love to which the creature is subject. And since she makes it her food, it is spread throughout all of her members, and because it is spread everywhere, she has the strength to bear the flames of love that consume her and give her life. By containing love within her, by possessing it, she no longer feels those intense desires, those anxieties, but she only feels that she loves more the love that she possesses. This is the love of the Blessed in Heaven – this is my own love. The Blessed burn, but without anxiety, without clamor, rather, with solidity, with admirable seriousness. This is the sign that a soul has come to feed on love: she loses more and more the characteristics of human love. In fact, if one sees only desires, anxieties, surges, it is a sign that love is not her food, but it is only a few particles of herself that she has dedicated to love. So, since she is not all love, she does not have the strength to contain it, and so she has those surges of human love. These souls are very voluble, and without stability in their things; while the former ones are stable, like mountains that never move.”
December 16, 1908
The privation of Jesus is the greatest of all pains.
Going through most bitter days, I was lamenting to Our Lord, saying: ‘How cruelly You have left me! You told me that You had chosen me as your little daughter, that You would keep me always in your arms – and now? You have thrown me to the ground, and instead of a little daughter, I see that You have changed me into a little martyr; but even though little, my martyrdom is just as cruel and harsh, bitter and intense.’ While I was saying this, He moved in my interior and told me: “My daughter, you are mistaken - my Will is not to make you a little martyr, but a great martyr. If I give you the strength to bear my privation with patience and resignation – which is the most painful and most bitter thing that can be found, and there is no other pain that equals it or resembles it either in Heaven or on earth – is this not heroism of patience and the ultimate degree of love, compared to which, all other loves remain behind, are almost nullified, and there is nothing that can compare to it or stand before it? Is this not, then, great martyrdom? You say that you are a little martyr because you feel you do not suffer so much. It is not that you do not suffer, but it is the martyrdom of my privation that absorbs your other pains, making them even disappear. In fact, in thinking that you are without Me, you neither bother about nor pay attention to your other sufferings; and by not paying attention to them, you reach the point of not feeling their weight, therefore you say you do not suffer.
And then, I have not thrown you to the ground; rather, I keep you more than ever clasped in my arms. Even more, I tell you that if to Paul I gave my efficacious grace at the beginning of his conversion, to you I give it almost continually – and this is the sign of it: that you continue in your interior everything that you used to do when I was with you almost continually - doing what now you seem to do by yourself. Your feeling all immersed in Me and bound to Me, always thinking of Me even though you do not see Me – this is not your own thing, nor an ordinary grace, but special and efficacious grace. And if I give you much, it is a sign that I love you much, and I want to be loved much by you.”
December 25, 1908
How to make Jesus be born and grow in your hearts.
Finding myself in my usual state, I was longing for little Baby Jesus, and after many hardships, He made Himself seen in my interior as a little Baby, and told me: “My daughter, the best way to make Me be born in one’s own heart, is to empty oneself of everything, because in finding empty space, I can place all my goods in it. And only then can I remain in it forever, if there is room to be able to carry all that belongs to Me, all that is my own. A person who went to live in the house of someone else, could be called happy only if he found empty space in which to be able to put all of his belongings; otherwise, he would be unhappy. So I am.
The second thing in order to make Me be born and to increase my happiness, is that everything the soul contains, both internal and external - everything, must be done for Me; everything must serve to honor Me, to execute my orders. If only one thing, one thought, one word, is not for Me, I feel unhappy, and while I should be the master, they make Me a slave. Can I tolerate all this?
The third one is heroic love, magnified love, love of sacrifice. These three loves make my happiness grow in a marvelous way, because they render the soul capable of works which are superior to her strengths, as she does them with my strength alone. They will expand her, by making not only her, but also others love Me. And she will reach the point of enduring anything, even death, in order to triumph in everything, and be able to say to Me: ‘I have nothing else; everything is only love for You.’ In this way, she will not only make Me be born, but will make Me grow, and will form a beautiful paradise in her heart.”
As He was saying this, I looked at Him, and from little, in one instant He became big, in such a way that I remained completely filled with Him. Then everything disappeared.
December 27, 1908
What passed between Baby Jesus and His sweet Mama when She would feed Him from Her breast. The ‘I love You’ of the creature is requited by the ‘I love you’ of the Creator.
I was meditating on when the Queen Mama would give Her milk to Baby Jesus. I was saying to myself: ‘What must have passed between the Most Holy Mama and little Jesus in this act?’ At that moment, I felt Him move in my interior, and I heard Him say to me: “My daughter, when I suckled milk from the breast of my most sweet Mother, together with milk I suckled the love of Her Heart – and it was more love than milk that I suckled. While suckling, I would hear Her say to Me: ‘I love You, I love You, O Son’; and I would repeat to Her: ‘I love You, I love You, O Mama.’ And I was not alone in this; at my ‘I love You’, the Father, the Holy Spirit and the whole of Creation - the Angels, the Saints, the stars, the sun, the drops of water, the plants, the flowers, the grains of sand, all of the elements, would run after my ‘I love You’, and repeat: ‘We love You, we love You, O Mother of our God, in the love of our Creator.’
My Mother could see all this, and would remained inundated. She could find not even a tiny space in which She would not hear Me say that I loved Her. Her love would remain behind and almost alone, and She would repeat: ‘I love You, I love You….’ But She could never match Me, because the love of a creature has its limits, its time, while my love is uncreated, unending, eternal. The same happens to any soul when she says to me, ‘I love You’; I too repeat to her, ‘I love you’, and with Me is the whole Creation, loving her in my love. Oh, if creatures comprehended what good and honor they procure for themselves even by just saying to Me: ‘I love You’! This alone would be enough – a God beside them who, honoring them, replies: ‘I love you too.”
December 28, 1908
Earthquakes in Sicily and Calabria.
Finding myself in my usual state, I felt as if the earth were shaking and wanted to slip away from beneath us. I was concerned, and I said to myself: ‘Lord, Lord, what is this?’ And He, in my interior: “Earthquakes.” And He kept silent.
I almost paid no attention to Him, and within myself I continued my usual interior things when, all of a sudden, about five hours after that word had been spoken to me, I felt the earthquake sensibly. As soon as I felt it cease, I found myself outside of myself. Almost confused, I could see harrowing things, but this sight was immediately removed from me, and I found myself inside a church. A young man clothed in white came from the altar – I believe He was Our Lord, but I cannot tell with certainty – and drawing near me, with an imposing look He told me: “Come”.
I shrugged my shoulders, without getting up, and calculating within me that at that hour He was scourging and destroying, I said: ‘Lord, You want to take me now?!’, almost refusing His invitation. And the young man threw Himself into my arms, and in my interior I heard Him say: “Come, o daughter, that I may end it with the world; I will destroy a great part of it, with earthquakes, with waters and with wars.” After this, I found myself inside myself.
December 30, 1908
The infancy of Jesus to divinize the infancy of all.
I was meditating on the mystery of His infancy, and I said to myself: ‘My Baby, to how many pains You wanted to subject Yourself! It was not enough for You to come as an adult – You wanted to come as a baby, and suffer from the swaddling clothes, from silence, from the immobility of your little Humanity, of your feet, of your hands… Why all this?’
While I was saying this, He moved in my interior and told me: “My daughter, my works are perfect. I wanted to come as a little infant in order to divinize all the sacrifices and all the little actions of infancy. So, until children begin to commit sins, everything remains absorbed in my childhood, and divinized by Me. When sin then begins, separation begins between Me and the creature - a separation which is sorrowful for Me, and mournful for them.”
And I: ‘How can this be, if babies do not have reason, and are not capable of deserving?’ And He: “First, because I give merit by my grace; second, because it is not out of their will that they do not want to deserve, but because such is the state of infancy disposed by Me. Besides, a gardener who has planted a plant is not only honored, but he also picks the fruit of it, even though the plant does not have reason; the same for an artisan who makes a statue, and for many other things. Sin alone is that which destroys everything and separates the creature from Me; but everything else, even the most trivial action, comes to the creatures from Me, and to Me it returns, with the mark of the honor of my Creation.”
January 2, 1909
More about earthquakes. The Sacramental lot of Jesus under the rubble is less hard than in many Tabernacles.
To my great repugnance and only to obey, I continue to tell what has happened from December 28, regarding the earthquake. I was thinking to myself about the lot of so many poor people, alive under the rocks, and about the lot of my Lord in the Sacrament, He too alive and buried under the rubble; and I said to myself: ‘It seems as if the Lord is saying to those people: “I have had your same lot because of your sins. I am together with you to help you, to give you strength. I love you so much that I am waiting for one last act of love to save you all, not taking into account all the evil you have done in the past”. Ah! my Good, my Life and my All, I send You my adorations under the rubble – wherever You are; and my embraces, kisses and all my powers to keep You continuous company. Oh, how I wish I could come to dig you out, to put you in a more comfortable place, and more worthy of You!’
At that moment, my adorable Jesus told me in my interior: “My daughter, you have somehow interpreted the excesses of love which, even while scourging, I send to the peoples. But this is not all - there is more. Know that my Sacramental lot is perhaps less unhappy, less nauseating under the rocks than in the tabernacles. The number of sacrileges committed by priests, and also by the people, is such that I was tired of descending into their hands and into their hearts, to the point of being forced to destroy almost all of them. And then, what about the ambition and the scandals of priests? Everything was darkness in them, they were no longer the light which they should be; and when priests reach the point of no longer giving out light, the peoples reach the excesses, and my justice is forced to destroy them.”
I was also thinking about His privations, and I felt a fear in me, as if some strong earthquake were also to happen here. In seeing myself so alone without Jesus, I felt so oppressed as to feel I was dying. Then, having compassion for me, good Jesus came, just a shadow, and told me: “My daughter, do not oppress yourself so much; out of regard for you I will spare this city most grave damages. See if I should not continue to chastise: instead of converting, of surrendering, in hearing of the destruction of other provinces they say that it is those places and lands that make this happen, and so they take their own good time, continuing to offend Me. How blind and foolish they are – is the whole earth not in the palm of my hand? Could I perhaps not open chasms in the earth and cause them to be swallowed in other places as well? And to show them this, I will cause earthquakes in other places, in which they do not usually occur.”
While saying this, He seemed to stretch out His hand into the center of the earth, taking some fire and moving it closer to the surface of the earth; and the earth would shake and the earthquake would be felt, some places more intensely, some places less. And He added: “This is only the beginning of the chastisements – what will be the end of them?”
January 8, 1909
The fruit and the purpose of Communion.
Having received Communion, at the best moment I was thinking of how I could cling to blessed Jesus more then ever, and He said to me: “In order to cling more tightly to Me, to the point of dissolving your being in Mine, just as I transfuse Mine into yours, you must take what is Mine in everything, and in everything leave what is yours; in such a way that if you always think of things which are holy and regard only what is good, and the honor and glory of God, you leave your mind and take the divine. If you speak, if you operate good, and only out of love for God, you leave your mouth and your hands, and you take my mouth and my hands. If you walk along holy and upright paths, you will walk with my own feet; if your heart loves Me alone, you will leave your heart and will take Mine, and will love Me with my own love; and so with all the rest. So, you will be enveloped with all my things, and I with all of yours. Can there be a tighter union than this? If the soul reaches the point of no longer recognizing herself, but the Divine Being within her, these are the fruits of good Communions, and this is the divine purpose in wanting to communicate Himself to souls. But, how frustrated my love remains, and how few are the fruits that souls gather from this Sacrament, to the point that the majority of them remains indifferent, and even nauseated by this divine food.”
January 22, 1909
When God is debtor of the soul.
I was thinking about the many privations of Our Lord, and about the fact that once, years ago, after I had waited for Our Lord for a few hours, when He came I lamented to Him for He had made me struggle so much for His coming, and blessed Jesus told me: “My daughter, when I surprise you, anticipating your yearnings for Me, and I come without having you wait, then you are my debtor. But when I have you wait for some time and then I come, I become your debtor – and do you think it is trivial that a God gives you the occasion to make Him your debtor?”
And I was saying to myself: ‘At that time, it was hours, but now it is days – who knows how many debts He has made with me! I believe they are innumerable, because He has been having many of these whims.’ But then I thought to myself: ‘And what is the good for me to have a God debtor? I believe that to have Him as debtor or to be His debtor is the same for Jesus, because in one instant He can give so much to the soul as to equal and surpass the debts He has – and so, here is how the debts are canceled.’
But while I was thinking of this, blessed Jesus told me in my interior: “My daughter, you are speaking nonsense. In addition to the ‘spontaneous gifts’ that I give to souls, there are the ‘gifts of bond’. To the souls of the ‘spontaneous gifts’, I may give or may not – it is my choice, because no bond binds Me; but with the souls of the ‘gifts of bond’, as in your case, I am bound and forced to give them what they want, and to grant them my gifts. Imagine a gentleman and two persons; one of these two persons keeps his money in the hands of the gentleman, while the other does not. That gentleman may give to both one and the other; but which one is more sure to obtain in a circumstance of need – the one who has money in the hands of the gentleman, or the one who does not? Certainly the one who has the money will have all the good dispositions, the courage, the confidence to go and ask for what is deposited in the hands of that gentleman. And if he sees him hesitant in giving, he will say to him, frankly: ‘You better give it to me, and quickly, because indeed I am not asking you for what is yours, but for what is mine.’ On the other hand, if the other one goes, who has nothing deposited in the hands of that gentleman, he will go timidly, without confidence, and it will be up to the gentleman, whether he wants to give him some help or not. This is the difference that passes between when I am the debtor, and when I am not. If you could understand what immense goods are produced by having a credit with Me!”
I add that while I was writing, I was thinking to myself about some more nonsense: ‘When I am in Heaven, my dear Jesus, You will feel irritated for having made so many debts with me; while if you come now, since I become the debtor, You, who are so good, at the first encounter we will have, will cancel all my debts. But I, who am bad, will not let it go, and will demand payment for even a breath of waiting.’ But while I was thinking of this, He told me in my interior: “My daughter, I will not feel irritation, but contentment, because my debts are debts of love, and I desire to be the debtor more than to have you as my debtor. In fact, these debts which I make with you, while being debts for Me, will be pledges and treasures which I will keep in my Heart for eternity, and which will give you the right to be loved by Me more than others. This will be one more joy and glory for Me, and you will be repaid for even a breath, a minute, a desire, a heartbeat; and the more pressing and greedy you will be in demanding, the more pleasure you will give Me, and the more I will give you. Are you happy now?” I remained confused, and did not know what else to say.
January 27, 1909
‘Luisa of the Passion of the Tabernacle’.
Continuing in my usual state, I said to myself: ‘What a useless life mine is – what good do I do? Everything is over; there is no more sharing in thorns, crosses, nails – it seems that everything is exhausted. I do feel suffering, to the point that I cannot move - it is a general rheumatism of pain; but it is something all natural. I am only left with the continuous thought of the Passion, and the union of my will with that of Jesus, offering what He suffered and all of myself as He wants, for whomever He wants; but apart from this, there is nothing but squalid misery. So, what is the purpose of my life?’
While I was thinking of this, blessed Jesus came, just a flash, and told me: “My daughter, do you know who you are? ‘Luisa of the Passion of the Tabernacle’. When I share my pains with you, you are still ‘of Calvary’; when I don’t, you are ‘of the Tabernacle’. See how true this is: in the Tabernacle, I show nothing on the outside – neither crosses, nor thorns; yet, my immolation is the same as on Calvary, the prayers are the same, the offering of my life still continues, my Will has not changed in anything, I burn with thirst for the salvation of souls… I can say that the things of my sacramental life, united with those of my mortal life, are always at one point – they have decreased in nothing; however, everything is interior. So, if your will is the same as when I used to share my pains with you, if your offerings are similar, if your interior is united with Me, with my Will – am I not right in saying that that you are Luisa of the Passion of the Tabernacle? With this difference alone: that when I share my pains with you, you take part in my mortal life, and I spare the world the gravest scourges; when I do not share them with you, I scourge the world, and you take part in my sacramental life – but the life is always one.”
January 28, 1909
What victim means.
Having read a book that talked about the different ways of operating interiorly, and about how Jesus would compensate these souls with a great capital of grace and with superabundant love, I compared everything I had read to the many ways and the many different acts that Jesus had taught me in my interior, which, compared to those of the book, seemed to me to be so vast as the sea compared to a little river. And I said to myself: ‘If this is true, who knows how much grace my always lovable Jesus pours in me, and how much love He has for me!’ Then, as I found myself in my usual state, good Jesus came for just a little, and told me: “My daughter, you do not yet know well what it means to be chosen as victim. Just as I, by being victim, enclosed in Me all the acts of creatures, their satisfactions, reparations, adorations and thanksgivings, in such a way that I did for all and for each one that which they were supposed to do; in the same way, since you are victim, it is useless to compare yourself to others, because you must enclose within you, not the way of one, but the variety of the ways of each one. And since I must have you make up for all and for each one, as a consequence I must give you, not the grace that I give to one alone, but as much grace as to equal what I give to the whole of creatures. Therefore, love too must surpass all the love I have for the whole of creatures, because grace and love always go together; they have one single step, one single measure, one single will. Love draws grace, grace draws love – they are inseparable. This is why you see the most extensive sea which I have placed in you, and the little river in others.” I remained astounded, comparing so much grace to so much ingratitude and badness of mine.
January 30, 1909
The story of ‘why’.
Finding myself in my usual state, I found myself outside of myself; I seemed to see a soul in Purgatory, whom I knew, and I said to her: ‘Take a look at how I am before God – I am so concerned about it, especially about the state in which I find myself.’ And she told me: “It takes nothing to know whether you are doing well or badly: if you appreciate suffering, you are doing well; if you don’t, you are doing badly. In fact, one who appreciates suffering, appreciates God; and by appreciating Him, one can never displease Him. Things which are appreciated, are also esteemed, loved, and one cherishes them and keeps them safe, more than oneself. Can it ever be possible that one wants evil for himself? In the same way, it is impossible that one may displease God, if he appreciates Him.”
Then, afterwards, blessed Jesus came for just a little, and told me: “My daughter, in almost all of the events that occur, creatures keep repeating, over and over again: ‘And why? And why? And why? Why this illness? Why this interior state? Why this scourge?’ And many other why’s. The explanation of ‘why’ is not written on earth, but in Heaven, and there everyone will read it. Do you know what ‘why’ is? It is egoism, which gives continuous food to love of self. Do you know where ‘why’ was created? In hell. Who was the first one that pronounced it? A demon. The effects produced by the first ‘why’ were the loss of innocence in Eden Itself, the war of untamable passions, the ruin of many souls, the evils of life. The story of ‘why’ is long; it is enough to tell you that there is no evil in the world which does not carry the mark of ‘why’. ‘Why’ is destruction of divine wisdom in souls. And do you know where ‘why’ will be buried? In hell, to make them restless for eternity, without ever giving them peace. The art of ‘why’ is to wage war against souls, without ever giving them respite.”